Letting go and letting the naked women swim by

Posted on March 9, 2013 by melkimb

I rest here upon the banks of Ewen Maddock Dam gazing at the last evening sunlight and its glow against the reeds. Two women are floating in the water in front of me, their naked breasts a pale beautiful contrast against the clear dark water. I ponder on how beautiful and sadly unusual it is to see a woman, naked in her splendor, resting in the arms of nature.

Here I am at the Being Women retreat. Where else would there be a gathering of naked women! My friend Kate, forever the woman that reaches out and brings people together, put in a last minute phone call to me and helped me say yes to participating in this event. Thank you and many blessings Kate.

It’s not easy to say yes to yourself in the tumult of life. There is always something else that you can be doing rather than nurturing yourself. When you’ve been giving and depleting yourself for too long, it can seem difficult, seemingly impossible to sink out of the haze and back into yourself.

When your vision and passion for yourself and your life is strong, it can consume you. As an entrepreneur, I have found that the vision I have for my work is so entwined with my dreams for myself and I am constantly seduced into doing more and being more in my journey to self-realisation.

Oh what folly! The more I strive to be all that I am, the less I am all that I am. The more I give from a place of emptiness (more on the energetic dymanics of being depleted in your heart space soon), the less I enrich others lives. In my moments of stillness, or as tends to happen to me: in extreme, intense disharmony; I become aware of the attachment I have to my own self-realisation.

Dropping the need to be a better person might be one of the hardest things we have to do.

Allowing yourself to surrender your expectations of yourself is the first step to self-acceptance. In this space, you can find peace with where you are and ultimately, who you are.

I’m trying not to care so much about whether the dishes are done or if the boys are reaching their potential. Whether my partner and I are as tantric and soulful as I want to be and whether I’m as an amazing person as my mind would like to believe. I’m dedicated to letting go of my need for perfection, or better yet, welcoming my imperfection whole-heartedly.

The first step in this slightly rocky journey of imperfection is to say yes to yourself to slow down and turn your gaze inward. Say yes to receiving love and support, or even ask for help. We don’t ask because we don’t want to be a burden, yet it makes people feel good to share their love.

Let go of the to-do list and step outside your front door and into the world to connect with the moment that is here and alive and juicy.

It is the only path to self-realisation, but remember you don’t have to be attached to that either ;)

What can you do to slow down and drop the expectations you have of yourself?

The ‘yes’ is here and you are so ready for it.

In column: Creative fire: life + business + wildest dreams, Discover yourself: spirit + love
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Why my need to be perfect blocks me from doing what I love

Posted on November 25, 2012 by melkimb

I’ve typed this sentence over and over again because I couldn’t find the perfect words to write. With my blogging, I tend to oscillate over which words piece together a moving, yet grooving prose, I draw deep breathes in trying to invoke my inner voice and I end up with about 100 different unfinished blogs of beautiful reflections I wanted to convey but could never quite complete them.

I never finish them because I worry too much about how someone else might perceive my work and spend my time trimming, pruning, molding and bolstering (aka procrastinating) in order to avoid taking the risk of putting myself out there in an imperfect way.

I feel like a work of art collecting dust in the cupboard.

So many of us stifle our offering because we have already judged it not good enough. From unfinished creative pieces to dreams we never see to fruition, the need to be perfect chokes us every step of the way toward our brilliance.

 

Perfectionism is such a sneaky bugger! My clever (?) mind convinces me that I need to focus on doing a million and one things in order to live in a connected and happy way. When things are perfect, I’ll be happy. Maybe tomorrow when the chores are done and the to-do list ticked off I’ll have time to be creative or adventurous or raw and brilliant. Pah! Tomorrow I may be dead, or on another long karmic loop to learn the same lesson.

 

No thank you.

 

With great courage and holding a space for this resistance that threatens to erupt within me, I am choosing to let go of my need to be perfect. By doing so, I trust that I will be pretty damn good anyway. Feels scary but true.

 

So I’m writing this little dedication to myself and putting it out there so I am accountable to myself, and to you:

 

I make simple choices to seemingly complex problems. Even though these aren’t my most ideal, perfect solutions, they will support me to be fulfilled.

 

I focus on that which lights me up, instead of that which bogs me down.

 

I participate in the sacredness of this moment, nothing more nothing less.

 

I am a channel for my own light to shine. Any blocks that I put in my own way are lovingly dismantled.

 

I connect with others because my love desires to flow and knows no bounds, not from any need to be validated or accepted.

 

So what that actually looks like is I’m going to blog more often. Why? Because this creative energy within me desires to be expressed and that makes me feel good. Because I want to connect with the people who want to connect with me. I’m not going to edit my blogs like a crazy woman (haven’t edited this one, have you noticed?). I will make simple decisions about my database and website, things that have been scaring the bejeezes out of me.

 

I deserve much fulfillment in my imperfect life.

 

So do you.

 

Now my love, where is your inner perfectionist leading you down the garden path of procrastination? What might you need to say to her?  

In column: Creative fire: life + business + wildest dreams
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Reigniting my love affair with kinesiology

Posted on August 27, 2012 by melkimb

So, I got balanced a few weeks ago – lovingly, profoundly; balanced, kinesiology style. It’s been a while. The danger of doing what you love is that you can sometimes become complacent with its beauty.

 

My love affair with kinesiology started from the moment someone first laid their delicate fingers on my muscles. It was an electric-sizzle-in-strange-parts-of-my-body-and-my-heart-just-opened kind of love.

 

Since then I’ve developed a rich bag of kinesiology tricks to support me through any issue. I regularly accept, feel, pulse, clear, charge, synchronise, transform, hold, dissolve and release.

 

Doing nothing, as the Dao says, works well too. Yesterday, I was reminded of how powerful it can be when someone else holds your hand and guides you through the morass into your light. It made me ponder how much of an act of love it was to give yourself some self-care. You so deserve it.

 

Here’s what she offered me, and I’ll never be the same again.

 

Step 1: setting my intentions

 

Kinesiology is great when using it to harness your personal dreams. The idea is to set your intentions and then work to believe whole-heartedly and holographically in them.  These were the intentions I chose on this day:

 

To feel abundant in my business and my personal life, so that I’m not working frantically on things all the time.

 

To feel more joyful, more of the time, instead of feeling overwhelmed and stressed.

 

To have vitality in my body and feel connected to it, not heavy, tired or with a sore left hip.

 

These intentions in themselves are no big surprise. They’ve been my truth for a long time now, but the charge I felt when I expressed them was unexpected. A tear escaped and my kinesiologist handed me a tissue.  When someone really listens to you, it’s amazing what emotions pour through your floodgates.

 

Step 2: on the table for some spiritual surgery

 

I lay upon the table as my kinesiologist began to pinpoint areas that were out of harmony with my intentions.

 

How does she do this? By assessing the biofeedback communication between my brain and muscles. Using this system means that you can gather information from deep within the subconscious and begin to understand the real reasons you feel the way you do.

 

I wasn’t surprised when she said that my sacral energy (powering my reproductive system) was shut down. Ah, that’s why I’ve had no libido, an intense build up to my period and tension in my relationship.

 

The biofeedback indicated that my limbic emotional brain was firing with a bunch of messages about overwhelm, freezing and escaping. This is the sense of feeling like you’re drowning, not being able to move and trying to get the hell out of there. Those who know me well will attest to my desire to escape when things get heavy – I’ve been a two year limit type of girl, give me a new job, new country and new relationship and I’ll feel relieved. Never resolved, just relieved.

 

Things got interesting when she began to know things about why I would be like this. Track back through my neurology and she shone the light on times when I felt trapped: four years ago; aged 19; aged 12; a-huh, a-huh, a-huh. Spot-on sister.

 

She cradled power points on my cranium to help calm the charge in my memory system as she asked me questions and I said the first thing that came to mind:

 

What does feeling trapped mean to you? Loss of freedom

 

What is losing freedom? Losing myself

 

What is losing myself? Death and emptiness.

 

She asked kindly, so that’s why you feel like you have to put so much energy into your intentions – because you’re fighting death and emptiness within you? Oh yes, that feels true.

 

It’s interesting how peaceful I felt at this point – empty but completely present. Peace isn’t the absence of pain. It is the clarity of knowing the truth.

 

Step 3: coming home and welcoming the grace of healing

 

She might have touched my heart then, but I can’t be sure. My cranial bones were pulsing with that much energy I felt limitless.

 

Kinesiologists work in synchrony with your body to release whatever stress holds you back from coming home into your essential self. It is here the depth of your being can welcome the grace of healing to do what no amount of effort and striving in the mind can achieve.

 

My kinesiologist did no healing that day. She just held a space for me to re-connect the dots and choose a higher wisdom for myself.

 

Feeling clear she asks me what death and emptiness mean to me? “Life and fullness,” I say.  Yin, yang.

 

Step 4: integrate into your life

 

And from that moment, I’ve felt my inner vessel filling with life force. There is no struggle; no fight to feel complete. I just check in every now and again and it’s still flowing.

 

From this shift, my intentions have felt easier. But I’ve also had a deeper understanding about that state of emptiness that sometimes creeps up on me.  My biggest realisation is that I no longer have to hold it, nor create a story around it. I can simply let it go.

 

And interestingly, my left hip no longer aches.

 

I may not be able to rationalise all those changes that happened that day, but golly, kinesiology sure can work miracles. I think I’m in love.

 

What can you do for yourself to feel good again?

 

Melissa x

In column: Discover yourself: spirit + love, Your body is a temple: mind + body + emotions
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Want some abundance? My free offer to you.

Posted on August 16, 2012 by melkimb

Today, I’d like to offer you my free abundance visualisation. Keep reading and I’ll tell you why this will create amazing change in your life.

 

My dad used to tell me that I was charmed.

 

I made stuff happen. I used to think that the universe had my back. If my desires were true enough, it would help set up the conditions for them to come to fruition. This method helped particularly when things got hard and I couldn’t see a way through. If I asked whole-heartedly for help, then help always arrived.

 

Once, as a student engineer, I ‘stole’ a copy of a report on waste management in the Maldives because I thought it would be so cool to work there. It was soon thrown in a box and out of mind. Years later when I was throwing out all my old engineering stuff I found that report. In awe, I reflected on what I had created; having just returned from my first Red Cross mission, randomly allocated to me as a waste management project in the Maldives after the tsunami.

 

Time after time life demonstrated to me how real and prevalent miracles actually are. It wanted me to know this, but I wasn’t yet fit to work with the full power of this knowledge.

 

The deeper I dug into my treasure-chest of desires, the more tumultuous my creation became. When you’re unearthing the dreams of your heart, you tend to dredge up old fears and insecurities. One moment I’d be standing in the fire of my own creation and the next I’d let myself be washed down with the waters of doubt.

 

One day I had the realisation that if I’m going to take the unconventional path and live life from the centre of myself, with all my wild dreams and crazy ideas, then I best become polished at this creation thing. Otherwise living your dreams can feel stressful, overwhelming and scarce. One of the first things I wanted to learn was how to turn my abundant thoughts into abundant realities. I wanted to actually start experiencing it.

 

Abundance and synchronicity are ours to harness. All we need to do is set up the conditions for them.

 

My partner and I started the practice of doing an abundance visualisation before we went to bed. Whether it was overwhelm, confusion or the inability to solve a problem, we laid it to rest and welcomed an ocean of abundance into our world. We let that abundance seep into every cell of our being.

 

And the change has been pretty amazing.

 

At first, cool things started to happen like people offering themselves to take-over something that I had committed to yet felt totally over-committed by. Then a creative project that had stopped dead in its tracks got a burst of life the very next day.

 

More clients than I’d ever experienced called that week. My online articles got a lot of traction. My friends were reaching out.

 

Most of all, I began to feel like I was sitting in my life in a different way. Like I’d broken open the bubbling spring of abundance and it wasn’t going to stop anytime soon.

 

So here I am, enjoying the fruits of many small dedications to living my life the way I desire. It doesn’t take the hard work or challenges away; it just adds the missing piece – reward for your whole-heartedness and dedication.

 

I want to offer this to you. Because I know it will create change for you in ways you can’t even imagine yet. I’ve fine-tuned the visualization process to include knowing your deepest desires, welcoming them into the world and letting abundance do the rest. All in 10 minutes! So however busy you are, there is time for this.

 

Just download the link below for all your abundance pleasures (right-click and save to your computer). Please note that you have to dedicate to it and use it regularly to see the transformation it brings. Use it at your own risk and with the knowing that you are completely responsible for your creation power.

 

Abundant desire visualisation

 

I’m really excited in the possibilities of this, so please share your experiences using the visualization with us in the comments.

 

All my love and abundance,

Melissa

In column: Creative fire: life + business + wildest dreams, Discover yourself: spirit + love, Your body is a temple: mind + body + emotions
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You’ve been rejected? So what.

Posted on August 1, 2012 by melkimb

I got rejected last week. It was my first rejection on a major scale. I wrote an article on weight-loss and it was lovingly received by many (I-cried-when-I-read-your-article conversations) and disregarded as pseudo-science by a few (you’re-not-a-MD comments).

 

While a whole lot of love was pouring in, my brain chose to attach itself to the criticism, like that alone measured my worth. My initial response was to sell off my passions and close up shop in exchange for a quieter, humbler existence.

 

This is not new. Being accepted has always seduced me more than being myself. When the stakes are high (a cute boy or a new job) the pain of believing you’re not loved is almost too much to bare.

 

Unfortunately, a slower, more insidious pain will weave into your heart if you try to avoid rejection. It’s the unbearable stagnation of avoiding the risks your soul has chosen. Your creative energy becomes a caged-beast chained, tortured and left to die unfulfilled.

 

Conformity sucks.

 

For you and for us.

 

When you make your choices based upon the small few who don’t like what you have to say, then you give up the opportunity to be of compassionate service to those who do connect with your truth. We lose your wisdom and instead gain your fear. No thank you!

 

And really, rejection isn’t quite as terrifying as we think it is.

 

When I was rejected, I panicked. I collapsed. I licked my wounds. And when I calmed back down, I realised it wasn’t actually that bad. It was actually kind of liberating; freer than I’d ever felt. If someone else’s opinion was the only thing that had been holding me back and I just experienced it, then what else is there to do?

 

Oh that’s right, keep shining.

 

It’s got me all excited at the prospect of opening up more and connecting with more people just by being who I am. Maybe breaking through my first rejection was all I needed to move completely into my truth?

 

So tell me, what might you be compromising in order to avoid your first, big rejection?

In column: Creative fire: life + business + wildest dreams, Discover yourself: spirit + love
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The one thing you need to know to get clear about your life’s purpose

Posted on July 26, 2012 by melkimb

This is a little piece of wisdom I wish I’d learnt a lot younger. I wish my parents had known it and had whispered it to me as they put me to bed. I wish they had reminded me when they saw me struggling in pain and making bad choices for myself.

 

But alas, my journey has been so beautiful that I’ve learnt it all by myself. Feels sweet that way.

 

It’s something I want you to know, because I see person after person coming into my clinic in agony thinking they don’t know what they should be doing with their life. They feel like they haven’t yet found the golden ‘thing’ that will make everything better.

 

The pain of not knowing gets their brain all jumbled up and even the simple question of ‘what inspires you’ creates fog and confusion.

 

Fear creeps in and they wonder whether they will ever be able to prove their worth and gain love and validation.

 

But here’s the truth:

 

There’s no such thing as a job, a qualification, a relationship or an endeavour that is meant to become your life purpose. When you tie your worth up in something outside of yourself, then your connection to your worth becomes conditional. It becomes a struggle to keep it from slipping through your finger tips.

 

There’s only one thing you’re meant to do and you don’t need to find it out.

 

Be divine.

 

Be like the tree in your backyard or the bright star in the sky. They never fret about who they are. Be a child of the earth. Be wild, be creative, be open. But most of all, please just be yourself.

 

It matters not how you express your creativity, when you’ve opened the floodgates to the luminous essence of your Self, you’ll find yourself capable and clear on many passionate and creative endeavours.

 

Then you’ll choose a path that suits you for the moment, as all the celestial points line up to bring the most exquisite opportunities to you.

 

You’ll be greater than you could have ever imagined because you’ve stopped trying to work it all out in your head.

 

Your greatest purpose becomes a moment by moment dedication to getting out of your own way and letting yourself create the exquisite creation possible:

 

YOU. 

In column: Discover yourself: spirit + love
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I wanna cuddle up in bed on days like these

Posted on July 12, 2012 by melkimb

Today I’m in bed. It’s a hard thing to admit as a health professional, as most of us in this industry worship the virtues of wellness, vitality and inspiration. Not only am I in bed but I have a cold, have devoured the complete behind-the-scenes takes of The Hobbit (can’t wait for the movie!), ate icecream even though I wasn’t hungry and have not achieved even one item on my to-do list.

It’s not easy when you’ve worked so hard to create harmony in your life and you end up drained or disheartened or sick. In these times there is always a little voice inside of you that ponders whether you’ve really got what it takes to live your heart desires. If you open up the ancient doorway to that voice, it can begin a flood of old hurts and victimhood stories.

Let’s not go there.

Your time of overwhelm and despondency is also a time for great consolidation and connection to your values. Are we true to our dreams even when we can’t see/feel/touch/taste/smell them…..yet? We can often romanticise about how our world should look and we expect it to look this way all of the time. When life becomes REAL – sometimes edgy, dark or chaotic – we must dig deep into our inner reserves to keep us steady and hold fast to those things we desire most. There is nothing sweeter than a dream realised after a journey there and back, with scraped shins and tired muscles, into the pit of the fire and out again.

As I look around my room, with clothes on the floor, feeling a body that is heavy and cumbersome, I harbour an inner conflict because this is not what I thought my dreams looked like. It’s hard to steady myself. But there is also a flowing truth within me, it’s literally like I can feel my hard toil laying the foundations for endless golden moments. The dream creation process is the art of inner alchemy, where you must transform every old way of being to allow your authentic Self clear passage. Sometimes this alchemy looks like taking the time to cry or sleep or disconnect or feel shitty as you release your wounds and make way for the new.

When I completely accept where I am I can acknowledge that this is what my dreams look like, evolving before my eyes. It makes me feel less ashamed of how I am being perceived as a health professional, because its not really about that. The work that lights me up is about inspiring individuals to unearth the authenticity and joy of who they are. That means that I have to accept and honour my authentic moments – even the ones my inner critic doesn’t approve of. I have to choose the currency of my soul rather than the reason of my ego. Every time.

It doesn’t interest me
what you do for a living.
I want to know
what you ache for
and if you dare to dream
of meeting your heart’s longing. Oriah Mountain Dreamer

If I could explain the soft connection that I have to my truth at the moment, it would look like this:

1. Hold my form

A wise sage will set an intention and not let it waver. By doing so he creates the conditions for the intention to grow and evolve, he holds a space for the universe to manifest within. If the infrastructure of your dreams is loose and conditional, every storm will knock it down.

To me, holding my form is the act of saying “I acknowledge that what I am experiencing right now is painful, but I will not waver from who I am and the understanding that who I am has an unfolding destiny of brilliance.”

When you do so you let the world know that you intend to weather any storm, holding a true course to your North Star. You role-model the attributes of any great creator in our world – great vision, great resilience AND great effort.

To kindle your vision you may need to step outside, out of the house or office, back to nature, into a soulful book, within your heart, out of your head – whatever works for you. But know that you must do it now. Let it be the top of your to-do list, the remedy to your overwhelm.

2. Be very aware

Next, develop a highly-tuned and multi-dimensional perception. If I had given space to my intuition last week, I would have known that my stress levels were rising, my blood sugar regulation was funky (yes, I don’t normally crave sugar at 3pm on the dot every day) and I needed to realign my position. I didn’t, so I ended up pushing myself into a dead-end street, seemingly a 1000 steps off track with a run-down immune system.

Perception is a muscle that responds well to exercise. All you need is a few quality moments each day to feel where you are. Not think, feel baby. And when you feel heavy, go with it, let the heaviness move and shift and release so you can melt into the symphony of being centred. When you are scattered and your energy is fragmented, you won’t be able to think your way out of anything. This is where your awareness must be given complete freedom, and a quiet mind, to do its magic.

3. Let softness in

Then you may let go, surrender, be soft. Life has a wisdom that our minds can’t always understand. It is a naïve creature who believes it can control the unfoldment and the outcomes of your world. The beauty is in being able to bond with the universe in your vision, to root deeply within it, and then to become completely soft to allow yourself to change course at life’s request. Maybe you’re stuck because you’re not allowing yourself to change?

The trials and tribulations of where you are right now are guiding you to delights beyond your wildest imagination.

Letting go always needs to include some time of rest and relaxation. You cannot give in the way we desire if you are exhausted. If you find yourself internally vibrating, unable to relax as you watch that sunset or drift off to sleep, then your adrenals are over stimulated. They’ve been running and running away from all real and perceived threats.
Rest is crucial because your dreams require hard work. The idea of surrender is not to give up the work, just to give up the fight.

For the time being, just in this moment, let yourself know that you are completely safe and it is safe to rest.

And when all is said and done, don’t stop dreaming.

I dream that I know, really believe, that each moment in my life is my dream unfolding. When the art of living my life, full-heart and full-spectrum is as much about the shitty moments as it is about the blissful ones. I dream of letting life move through me in a way where my mind gets out of the way and lets my heart guide. I dream of being seen in this authentic way and knowing that I am complete within. I dream this for you aswell.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed or sick or depressed, share with us in the comments below what your strategies are for pulling yourself out of a rut and staying true to your heart.

 

Melissa x

In column: Creative fire: life + business + wildest dreams, Discover yourself: spirit + love, Your body is a temple: mind + body + emotions
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Are you a real or romantic dreamer?

Posted on April 10, 2012 by melkimb

I’ve just spent Easter at the beach, re-energising my connection to the ocean. When I was young my life revolved around surfing. In the mornings I would ride my bike to the beach with my surfboard tucked under my arm, dive into the ocean as the sun was rising, meditate whilst riding waves and inevitably get to school late! In my mind and in my heart, I was always going to keep the ocean close to me and my morning rituals strong.

I now live in the country. So beautiful but so very distant from the ocean.

Whenever I reconnect with the ocean, I ponder how my life unfolded away from it and how I’m going to manifest my life back towards it. The country seems my home for a little while longer, with two step-children in school here and the constraint of them needing to stay close to their mother, I know I can’t just pick up and move.

Sometimes I grieve for a life I fantasised about. I had a spiritual awakening (crisis!) when I was 24 and left my job to travel the world working in developing countries for the Red Cross, sitting on ashram floors whilst chanting mantras and learning more about myself and how I wanted to create my life.

My sub-conscious ego felt safe that I had finally figured it all out.

I came back to Brisbane to study kinesiology and meet a partner whom I could travel the world with and birth global, nomadic children.

And then life, in all its wisdom, swept me into a world I had never imagined. As my fantasies were broken down in exchange for real love and real living, I’ve been challenged to let go of the identities I had fashioned for myself (one being oceanic surfer, another world traveller). Life is now more about playing and living in a deep way that is not always comfortable but one that offers the most opportunity for expressing my authentic self.

When we lay to rest our fanciful dreams and participate in the wisdom that life flows to us, we step into our real power to create in the world. We allow ourselves to re-calibrate our dreams through the lens of our true self, not through the limitations of the ego.

I know that the ocean and travel are still very much a part of who I am, but I’m dedicated to surrendering to the flow of life. If I learn to really let go of the outcomes, I know I’ll end up there anyway.

Dreaming real dreams is a delicate science. I explore in depth the three steps to dreaming authentically in a blog I wrote for Mindbodygreen here.

May your dreams come naturally to you.

In the comments below, please share what dreams you’ve had to recalibrate to align with life’s wisdom.

Melissa x

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Your true power is an act of surrender

Posted on March 5, 2012 by melkimb

I’ve worshipped the Priestess of Power my entire life. Not the conventional ideal of power, usually over someone or something, but the fierce and soft inner strength that comes with true empowerment.

I haven’t always known her well. I used to give her away for short thrills of affection, recognition and validation. I’ve laid on her alter and prayed for her light as my life raged dark around me. We’ve found rapture together as I spoke up in true strength. We’ve had some beautiful unions and some ugly separations.

I am dedicated to her, but at times I’ve struggled to find a still place within her.

No one can take your power without your permission.

I’ve let people rock me out of my power. A boss. An ex-boyfriend. My partner’s ex-wife. All the while being caught up in the fantasy that it was they who caused the issue, they who needed to be nicer, more compassionate and more understanding. I don’t make allowances for bad behaviour, but my frustration and powerless position are mine to own. My ego looks for faults in others, not recognising its own blind spots.

The more you struggle, the slipperier she gets.

Power is a journey that waxes and wanes. She is elusive. You think you have her and she will blow the winds of challenge into your life for you to demonstrate you are worthy of her presence. She recognises that life is more about living whole-heartedly than avoiding pain and disappointment. Can you sustain the inner glow of true power even when you lose control over your life?

If a rejection, hurt or fear has you wailing in deflated misery, then maybe you haven’t really known her at all.

Let go of the need to control and you will find true empowerment.

Power isn’t interested in the fight. She worships surrender. That’s why we’ve had it wrong all these years. Wars. Abuse. Greed. We’ve been fighting for something that never really existed: power-over instead of power-within. She laughs at you when you struggle, loves you completely when you yield.

Hold a position and power will flow right on by you.

She will meet you with warm hands to sooth a weary brow if you learn to surrender to the resistance you feel within right now. Bend like the willow tree, she says. She will guide you through your old hurts, restoring fact to the fictitious stories of deficiency you’ve learnt to tell yourself. You are empowered, she whispers. More than you’ve known. You are whole and you don’t need to change a thing.

 

I am the eternal spring that resides within you.
I am the infinite root and ever-expanding heart.
Offer yourself completely and willingly, and I am yours.
I am the truth that sets you free.

 

• How do you struggle for power?

• Are you holding onto a position that takes away your freedom to trust how your life is unfolding?

• Can you sink into that inner knowing of your true power? You are always empowered, regardless of external circumstances.

 

In column: Discover yourself: spirit + love
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Why you feel spacey after kinesiology and how to calm panic as you reconnect with your Self

Posted on February 21, 2012 by melkimb

I sometimes get these responses after my client’s first kinesiology sessions:

  • That was amazing, but I feel really strange
  • I was whacked afterwards, I had to go to bed
  • I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster

These experiences are perfectly natural and usually a good sign that things are moving and shifting in your greater good. However, I know how they can rock the boat and make you doubt your ability to create more stillness in your life.

Growth and transformation can be a vague thing. One minute you feel great like you’re really growing and working through your ‘stuff’ and the next minute you can feel like you’re at step one again.

Kinesiology is a very subtle but immensely powerful experience in your transformation, one that doesn’t always make clear, rational sense.

Here are some of the reasons you can feel this way after a kinesiology balance:

1. Growth is about dealing with those things you’ve been trying to escape (aka healing crisis)

Kinesiology will magnetise you back into your body and into the present moment. You sought out kinesiology because you felt stressed or overwhelmed or unstable. Your tension can be seen as a huge mass of resistance built up around your centre, literally keeping you outside of your essential Self and identified with your ego.

The ego will attempt to hold onto your tension and your sub-conscious memory will continually remember the pain of your past and keep you a victim to the emotional energy that is stuck within you.

Your anger, pain, grief and fear are aching to move on. Life’s emotions will naturally desire to flow, experience and release. Our ego will always deem flowing and experiencing a threat to our survival so we never allow ourselves to release our stress. Therefore we stayed locked and stagnated within a sea of old emotions.

As you dig deeper into your essential Self, you’re bound to dredge up some old gunk. The more your light flows through you, the more your dense, dark emotions will request your time and space to express themselves so that they can release. Your survival brain will assess this as too intense and overwhelming, but your wisdom tells you that it is time to let go of that which you no longer need.

Can you show up and be present with the emotional sensations within you whilst resisting the urge to escape or numb them with external substances (alcohol, food, pain killers)?

2. Connecting with your deeper self requires you to relax into the unknown, that vast feeling of emptiness often called the void

The void represents a laying to rest of the ego. We enter into the vast unknown. When we are free of our ego we become still and silent. The ego is the part of us that feels deficient, hurt, powerless and separate.

Kinesiology works to calm the ego and harness your natural wisdom. When the ego disappears; you feel it as a void. This feeling of emptiness is just because something which was always there is now not there.

Your survival brain will often go into panic mode at this stage. It has no way to understand this immense universe we live in, and more importantly the vast unknown internal depth to who we are.

Be aware of when your panic systems might be active. They will always set in when you feel uncomfortable, spacey or surreal. But if you stay present with the sensations you will begin to lay to rest the feeling of emptiness. Let it be.

At a point the void will be gone and the Self will be known. Here you will find deep peace.

3. Your body has spent a lot of time and energy holding onto its stress state, its now time for rejuvenation (sleep if you need!)

It takes energy to hold all of your stress structures in place. Stress alters the body through the autonomic nervous system (blood flow, adrenalin & noradrenaline) and through cortisol production in the endocrine pathways. Over time, if the stress is not resolved, it will begin to create immune dysfunction including oxidative stress and digestive system break down, changes how the body uses energy, increases toxicity and insulin resistance.

Stress also depletes our chi supply, creating disharmony in our energy body. As we deplete the chi we have available, we begin to access and draw down our pre-natal energy in our kidneys, called jing. Chinese medicine believes that our jing is our life force, when it is depleted, we die.

As we release the build-up of stress through all the major stress pathways with kinesiology, your body will begin to understand how much energy it has required to compensate for the stress and keep going.

You will need a period of rejuvenation as your chi begins to build and harmonise again.  As you sleep, you begin to recharge all of your nervous system and reconnect your spirit with your physical form, a deep process of healing.

Often many of the belief systems that created our stress will need to be debunked. The I-am-not-enough and I-must-be-perfect have been driving your adrenal glands through the roof.

It is time to know that you don’t need to achieve anything to be who you are. You have permission to rest.

Once rested and feeling whole again, apply your creative energy in an inspired and loving way.

Above all else, be gentle with yourself as you unfold. It may be slightly rocky but your journey home is an incredible one to make.

In column: Discover yourself: spirit + love, Your body is a temple: mind + body + emotions
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